For our Christmas vacation my family and I will be heading to Seattle where my husband and I grew up. It will be a return after six months of living in the Silicon Valley. I'm doing my best not to hyperventilate over who I should try to see or where we should spend our time. Do I kiss the fam goodbye and tell them to meet back in two weeks so we aren't fighting over what we should do every day?
Facing friends and family. The wrinkles are hanging on even when I'm not smiling. I wondered to myself, when did I start to care about such things? My travel schedule these past five years has kept me from seeing people for months, sometimes even years. When we meet I am always so delighted, and I mean really delighted to see how they have aged. Not because it's a vanity contest - who looks the most well preserved - but because we are aging and that's not such a bad thing. In a friend's eyes I see him or her; the essence of who that person is, not the shell. When people look unchanged, it's weird. I spend more time studying their face; is it a tuck, Botox, an expensive ointment? I can't even concentrate on what's being said.
As I tell my children, 'Any wrinkles I have, I've earned!' I think a kabuki face discredits our humanity. Life does have it's effects and when I'm used up, it will be okay to look the part. I want to live out fully whatever I have in me, without regrets. I don't know, what if going out without makeup meant I was going to miss the crazy fun happening outside my window or the flab on my legs kept me from jumping into the surf with my son. I would miss out on life because of my vanity. How stupid is that. If people pick me as a friend because I look good, shame on me for having chosen friendships out of shallow pools.
I look forward to seeing friends, who have aged with me. We get to catch up on the war stories and joys that have given us our concerned brow and our laugh lines. Wrinkles and time, our emerging culture seems to short both with a vengeance.Facing friends and family. The wrinkles are hanging on even when I'm not smiling. I wondered to myself, when did I start to care about such things? My travel schedule these past five years has kept me from seeing people for months, sometimes even years. When we meet I am always so delighted, and I mean really delighted to see how they have aged. Not because it's a vanity contest - who looks the most well preserved - but because we are aging and that's not such a bad thing. In a friend's eyes I see him or her; the essence of who that person is, not the shell. When people look unchanged, it's weird. I spend more time studying their face; is it a tuck, Botox, an expensive ointment? I can't even concentrate on what's being said.
As I tell my children, 'Any wrinkles I have, I've earned!' I think a kabuki face discredits our humanity. Life does have it's effects and when I'm used up, it will be okay to look the part. I want to live out fully whatever I have in me, without regrets. I don't know, what if going out without makeup meant I was going to miss the crazy fun happening outside my window or the flab on my legs kept me from jumping into the surf with my son. I would miss out on life because of my vanity. How stupid is that. If people pick me as a friend because I look good, shame on me for having chosen friendships out of shallow pools.